(To CS/’20 PhD
This Marble Monument
Is Erected by the State)

He was found by the Department of Education to be
One against whom there was no official complaint
And all the reports on his conduct agree
That, in the modern sense of an old-fashioned word, he 
was an academic,
For in everything he did he served the Intellectual Community
He always followed the scientific method of inquiry
But only when he was in classroom or in the laboratory
He held the proper opinions for the time of the year
When there was peace, he was for peace; when there was genocide, he
spoke of the liberal world order
He worked hard to close the ozone gap
But never uttered a word about the wealth gap
He always casts his vote for the lesser of the two evils
and he acknowledged that he was on stolen land
Was he privileged? Would he stand up for you? The question is absurd:
He was nice, and he was grateful, and that was all that mattered.

(A humble nod to W.H. Auden’s “The Unknown Citizen” in the current climate.)